That anyone who is ever going to go to college should totally watch. Like, damn. I really like it when Hindi movies impress me. Cause they do get kinda formulaic after awhile. But I still really like them, like alot =D Anywho, it was this really great movie about these three bros and they're at this engineering school and it's super hard and just watch it ok!! Sooooo good. It got me thinking about the whole college and what-am-I-going-to-do-for-the-rest-of-my-life-thing. I knoooooow I've blogged about this before and given it a million thoughts, but it's inevitable.
That movie made me understand why I can't decide on a career. (without exaggeration) I'm really torn between "doing what I love" and (basically) "getting a degree for a career that I'm pretty cool with that pays well so I can take care of everyone". And by take care of everyone....I mean like giving back. I wanna buy my mom one of those blue toothpaste colored cars or a Thunderbird and I want to buy my dad a house in Colorado and take him on trips to mountains and stuff and make sure that my parents don't have to work anymore then they have to and that my brother is taken care of and can have his own place someday and that I'll always be able to help my friends and that I can do cool things like build a hospital in Sierra Leone. Honestly thats what will make me happy. So do I reach this happiness (which inevitably involves lots of money) by doing something that I love or by toleration or something like along those lines?? Despite all these running thoughts I still have this unwavering faith that God will throw me into whatever life I'm meant to have; the places I should go and the career I should do and the people I am supposed to be with. I just really wish he would let me in on the plan sometimes though.
Even if I go with the first option, I WILL feel selfish. Because then I'm just out for myself right? And I can't help but want to make the people I love. Like, at our class reunion, I wanna be SOMETHING. I don't want to "settle" with my life. I mean, ok I was on our local tv station for this event I helped out with where I got interviewed, and my grandparents were really proud. Like, super proud. And that was just me being on TV talking to a police chief! I dunno man. Am I thinkin too much?
If I go with option two, I know I'll find happiness eventually. But when is eventually? I don't want that kind of ambition to digest my soul. I wish I wanted to be a doctor. I really do, but I don't. And I wish I wanted to be an engineer or some crazy entrepreneur, but I don't. I know I could be a brilliant advertiser. And that isn't me just making that up; I know I'd be good at that and I would make a lot of money and be successful. But if I was an advertising executive I would hate myself. I can't stand anything business related, I just couldn't devote my life to that. This is all rather complicated. I'm sorry if you've read this far; I really don't wanna sound like that dude in Notes from Underground. I'm just tryin to figure this out.
No comments:
Post a Comment