Break!

It is finally here. Now after a few days of stressfulness- it finally feels like Christmas break. I discovered that I really need to chill the eff about stuff sometimes. Like, as soon as we left school, I was thinkin "I have _____ work for _____ class to do-why arn't I doing it". Really now self-is that any way to spend senior year?
Arabic is finally over. Thank God. That was a semester's worth of ridiculousness. I realllllly hope college is not like Arabic class-if so that won't work out at all.
In other to-be-published news, I've heard back from 5 of my 6 applied colleges, which means, YES, I heard from UofM! Yeah they deferred me. Lol. I was really sad for one day, and then bitter, and to be honest the bitterness is still wearing off, but I've come to terms with it. And hey! I'm getting interviewed by some Duke guy next week! Yeah, if I got deferred from UofM, same thing will probably happen with Duke, but at least they care enough to count my personality ;D
Break is pretty chill so far. Spending alot of time at home, went sledding, had a girl's sleepover (which turned out to be pretty awesome), finished AP Euro homework (HUGE accomplishment) and and and finished Christmas shopping!
I got my brother the COOLEST thing. This!



The Limited-Edition-Only-At-Target-Red-and-Clear-Nerf-VULCAN-EBF-25!!!
And I thought of it before my parents. Hehehe.
I also finished Rahul's gift! And that's all on that subject :D
Christmas will be really great :) I hope everyone is well and all flights are safe and everyone feels warm and fuzzy inside! <3

I think I've finally settled down with life. I'm not freaking out about colleges anymore, and while I know I still have to try, I'm not gonna rule my life with that thought. It's a nice feeling that everything is going to be ok.



Christmas love is cool :D. I'm gonna go to bed now cause it's 4am. Goodnight, and have a good day today :)

Resolution

Heh. Turns out that last blog about my complaining actually got totally resolved. The DVD situation was fixed and the final: take home!!

I'm in such a spectacular mood right now it's ridiculous. I'm in a mood where "I turn off my computer-get up to go to bed-and think-hey I wanna blog about this happy feeling which is overflowing out of my heart and making every lil cell in my body smile". Maybe that's a bit to detailed. Well, I at least hope my cells are smiling. Or a majority of them. Anywho. This probably has to do with Rahul (who I probably talk about too much but thats ok). I don't know man. Maybe it's the plain white t's song that has been on repeat for the past half hour. Maybe it's that happy blog that Patti finally linked me to with all the pretty pictures that make your heart smile. But I mean, damn, this is a happy feeling. What a switch from yesterday. Basically, yesterday I got all worked up over a kind of little thing because I am a woman and that little thing was the feather to fall upon my crying pile. Poof. But now, everything is ok.


Dang...everything is ok. Like seriously, at this very moment, I couldn't tell you a single thing wrong with my life if I tried. Wow. Maybe that chicken my mom made for dinner was drugged. But really now! Is it silly of me to wanna smile like an idiot and hug people and smile at everyone on the street(which I do usually, but with more happiness than usual)? I'd say this is quite a lovely feeling. Which reminds me, I need to watch Love Actually before Christmas. OHH I'm so excited! You know, my family has this tradition of watching A Muppets Christmas Carol, the night of Christmas, after the rest of my family has gone to their homes. It's gonna be great, just the six of us (don't forget Poco and Chewy!) on the couch, watching the Muppets, together. Haha I sound like such a sap! But you know what! That's ok, because everything is ok, and I'm in love and it's Christmas time.

I hope you had a good day today. Because after all, it is Thursday :)

P.S. Something from my childhood that I hope makes you smile (worth the copy and paste!):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzfyK_0fmIU

The Essence of Complaint

I am currently killin time before sleepiness, bloggin, facebookin, and listening to the love actually soundtrack because it makes my heart feel all fuzzy and warm and happy. Yay happy hearts :)
However, I am in a bit of a pickle (which is a nice change from the recent career catastrophe) WHICH BY THE WAY. Didn't get resolved at all. I had a small possible epiphany, but changed my mind, until Sunday, when I got the best advice so far. My friend Mike said "Marianne, be you, and be happy. You have alot going to you and shouldn't stress, because the future will work itself out." And so for now, I'm chilling on the matter.
Back to the pickle. Actually multiple pickles all related to one giant pickle. Like a vegetable tray. I have 3 more Arabic classes left in this semester.
Vegetable 1) The teacher has yet to tell us when the final is.
Vegetable 2) He refuses to give us a study guide.
Vegetable 3) We just started a new book today. Which apparently, will have most of the final material in it. Mind you we have 3 classes left.
Vegetable 4) The used book I ordered like 4 months ago was supposed to come with a DVD. I didn't realize this until today. It did however come with a creepy distorted kodak picture of a nice looking girl and this ugly curly haired kid with (what I assume to be) a worm that was once submerged in tequila, now stuck up his nose. What the hell.
Vegetable 5) The DVD that I should have obtained has most of the material for the final on it.

So I'm wondering....is this normal for a college class? I really don't want to be complaining if it is. But I never expected a professor to be so sporadic and unpredictable with the subject matter. Like seriously, he hasn't told us when the final will be. 3 classes left.

My question for you: my fault or the professor's? Am I unprepared or is this situation as odd as I think it is? Advice is appreciated.

Just let me ramble a bit

Today was a very good day. I accomplished a lot of work, put up Christmas stuff, hung out with a cool person pretty much most of the day.
I'm really feeling Christmasy. Maybe it's just my family, but everyone is so much...glow-y around this time. And you're not as bothered by the little annoying things. Instead of piling up like usual,they evaporate. Which is a nice thought.

The four things on my mind right now are:
1) dubstep
2) cinnamon apple tea
3) my stupid career choice and Mark Zukerberg
4) scholarships

At first this list seems a bit intimidating, but the wonderful thing about fall break is it is chill as HELLLLLL. I could be any range of emotions right now, but I have no idea, cause it's so chill! I've come to appreciate chillness.
The silliest of the list, number 3. I just finished watching the social network ( it was pretty decent) and I got thinking about the whole career thing once more. Ya know I think I'm really jealous of super smart people. Like Mark Zukerberg. I wish I could do cool stuff like that. Obviously I couldn't invent facebook but...do you get what I mean? There was a line in the movie where someone said "Harvard students invent careers for themselves"
And I think, hey, I could do that. But then I think, wait, am I smart enough to do that? Not that I doubt how if my brain works or not. Just that...you know. I'm confident about myself...but not in that department. Because- who knows if I CAN be confident? I don't think I'm one of those people. Gah. I just don't want to go through life wondering if I could have done better. If I could've pushed myself more or aimed higher. Do other people do this? I certainly hope so...hah.
Are these blogs too long and rambly for anyone to actually read? Please let me know. And I hope I don't come off as whiny. Any help would be highly appreciated with the whole career thing btw.
Someone randomly just come up to me on the street and be like "hey! you'd be a great ______________"

That'd be nice but it's not gonna happen like that. At least I know I'm trying to work it out =)

3 Idiots is a Fantastic Movie

That anyone who is ever going to go to college should totally watch. Like, damn. I really like it when Hindi movies impress me. Cause they do get kinda formulaic after awhile. But I still really like them, like alot =D Anywho, it was this really great movie about these three bros and they're at this engineering school and it's super hard and just watch it ok!! Sooooo good. It got me thinking about the whole college and what-am-I-going-to-do-for-the-rest-of-my-life-thing. I knoooooow I've blogged about this before and given it a million thoughts, but it's inevitable.
That movie made me understand why I can't decide on a career. (without exaggeration) I'm really torn between "doing what I love" and (basically) "getting a degree for a career that I'm pretty cool with that pays well so I can take care of everyone". And by take care of everyone....I mean like giving back. I wanna buy my mom one of those blue toothpaste colored cars or a Thunderbird and I want to buy my dad a house in Colorado and take him on trips to mountains and stuff and make sure that my parents don't have to work anymore then they have to and that my brother is taken care of and can have his own place someday and that I'll always be able to help my friends and that I can do cool things like build a hospital in Sierra Leone. Honestly thats what will make me happy. So do I reach this happiness (which inevitably involves lots of money) by doing something that I love or by toleration or something like along those lines?? Despite all these running thoughts I still have this unwavering faith that God will throw me into whatever life I'm meant to have; the places I should go and the career I should do and the people I am supposed to be with. I just really wish he would let me in on the plan sometimes though.


Even if I go with the first option, I WILL feel selfish. Because then I'm just out for myself right? And I can't help but want to make the people I love. Like, at our class reunion, I wanna be SOMETHING. I don't want to "settle" with my life. I mean, ok I was on our local tv station for this event I helped out with where I got interviewed, and my grandparents were really proud. Like, super proud. And that was just me being on TV talking to a police chief! I dunno man. Am I thinkin too much?

If I go with option two, I know I'll find happiness eventually. But when is eventually? I don't want that kind of ambition to digest my soul. I wish I wanted to be a doctor. I really do, but I don't. And I wish I wanted to be an engineer or some crazy entrepreneur, but I don't. I know I could be a brilliant advertiser. And that isn't me just making that up; I know I'd be good at that and I would make a lot of money and be successful. But if I was an advertising executive I would hate myself. I can't stand anything business related, I just couldn't devote my life to that. This is all rather complicated. I'm sorry if you've read this far; I really don't wanna sound like that dude in Notes from Underground. I'm just tryin to figure this out.

Things I Could Have Done With My Evening...

So tonight I finished most of my homework before 9pm in order to watch 3 Idiots. I couldn't figure out how to get it to work, so instead of being productive, I stayed online for three hours reading FMLS and surfing youtube and doing absolutely positively nothing. So here is a list of things I could have done but didn't think of or chose not to do.

1) Sleep. That would've been nice.
2) Actually read the book for AP Lit homework. Also would have come in handy in the future.
3) Watched a movie that I've been wanting to watch for awhile. Sorry, Lagaan.
4) Updated my zune. Which I waited until now to do. 12% done at 11:30pm. wooooooo
5) Wrote this blog earlier!
6) Watched ALL of Outsourced.
7) Tried harder to study physics.
8) Applied for scholarships!
9) Started reviewing for bio olympiad. Sorry, bio.
10) Attempted to start Nanowrimo, which I actually have an idea for now.
11) BEEN PRODUCTIVE IN ANY POSSIBLE WAY!!!
12) Refrained from eating that bowl of ramen for dinner. Sorry, stomach.
13) Figured out where all my pictures from my computer went.
14) Researched for spring break location.
15) Taken my dog for a walk.
16) Do some of Arabic Unit 6, which I have neglected for about a week now. Sorry, weekend.
17) Figured out how to make sock puppets.
18) Learn enough Hindi so I could've watched 3 Idiots without subtitiles. Totally could've done that.
19) Cleaned my room!
20) File all of my college info.
21) GONE TO BED AND ACTUALLY GOTTEN A DECENT AMOUNT OF REST!!!!!
22) Not waited until now to discover that OMGOSH BUG AND LILLY GOT TOGETHER ON CROSSING JORDAN BUT THEN BUG WAS SUSPECTED FOR TERRORISM AND TORTURED AND WAS NEVER THE SAME AGAIN!!!!!???? eff you writers.
23) DONE ANYTHING PRODUCTIVE.

this list makes me mad at myself. that was such a pomhead thing to do. efffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff ok I'm going to bed

I'm supposed to be doing something else...

...right now. But! I would rather do this for now than Arabic. Which is aight. I'm definitely not dual enrolling next semester. The whole go to school all day than go to class 4 hours later thing isn't all that awesome. But waking up late is soooooooooo nice....like...even if I go to sleep at 11 I'm STILL getting 8 hours of sleep! Arabic is cool even though no one in the class knows whats going on. In retrospect I probably should've taken an advanced Spanish class (so I could recover my Spanish skills! which are suffering) or microbio. I miss bio. Isn't that sick?




Homecoming is in two weeks. And I NEEEEED to stop being a control freak about certain things. Such as group size, for example. I like to "plan" these kind of things and thought my friends and I could go to homecoming with a group of 20 or under. That was silly of me. People are too nice and want other people to feel included. I have half a mind to just go with a few other people. But..but...but... eh I guess the matter will figure itself out

Uhh lets see what do I wanna talk about. Oh, eff physics. No, mostly eff uncertainty and it's horrible annoying tendency to make this lab 2 days late, make me receive 50% on it, then have no clue how to fix it. Damn you uncertainty. No one needs you anyway.

On a happier note, I really wanna watch Lagaan (which I have owned for like 2 months and have yet to see) I already know all the songs too! Maybe thats what I should be doing right now haha. I also really wanna watch The Great Mouse Detectives. That was an excellent movie back in the day, still is. Back when mice in cartoon movies could smoke pipes and shoot guns and no one cared.




Life is going good. I'm really really-OHMYGOSHIDIDNTEVENMENTIONFRIDAY!!!!
SO on Friday I'm going to see Jay Sean. I actually won tickets, and I am unbelievably excited. Seriously, I gotta extend my list for the greatest (possible) nights of my life. Right now quite a few of the top spots are from this year =) that's a good sign






As I was saying I'm super excited for Friday. And Saturday. And Sunday. And the whole week after that.

I'm down like the e-co-no-myyyyyyy. hehe :D

The Past Few Days

A review!

Good Things:
The first day of school (and last first day of school I guess...) was a pretty dang good day! I went to school, went to AP Bio for the 2nd year in a row (hehe, no first block) and went to my other 5 very easy classes. I really love waking up late. And I really love how I didn't give myself a horrible schedule. And I love how I hung out until 7 on Tuesday. Just like those sophomore days :D:D Today was a good day too. Finished a college essay (finally) and went to Arabic class. Which was actually kinda stressful today. Apparently I looked like I was about to cry the whole time, but I was just super tired. haha poor teacher thinkin he was making me upset. I guess thats just my default face; when I don't put effort into my expression.

Bad Things:
Actually there really isn't anything bad about this year so far! I don't like how I almost never see Rahul in school. And I don't like how I don't know where most of my friends are in school until certain times of the day. And I don't like how I am a failure of a Student Ambassador because I have yet to find my foreign exchange students (who had to find their own way around the first 2 days...opps) But really thats about it! Just the lil hiccups of life.

I'm still excited about this year <3

What I Should Write for College Essays

Hokay, so I'm hoping my blog will get me in the writing-about-myself-and-how-college-worthy-I-am-mood.
SOOO. What should I write my common app essay about? Here are the options, as I try to think through them.

Evaluate a significant experience, achievement, risk you have taken, or ethical dilemma you have faced and its impact on you.

Well, I've never climbed a roof if that's what you're lookin for. Can't remember the last time I faced an ethical dilemma...what are my significant experiences?? Do I even have any??? Oh man.

Discuss some issue of personal, local, national, or international concern and its importance to you.
Immigration? The intense connections yet lack of understanding in our modern world?? Racism?? The importance of spell check at 1:28 am??


Indicate a person who has had a significant influence on you, and describe that influence.
Samuel L. Jackson. He taught me how to be a badassmuthafuka. Essay done.


Describe a character in fiction, a historical figure, or a creative work (as in art, music, science, etc.) that has had an influence on you, and explain that influence.
Whoever invented chocolate milk. Apparently some dude named Daniel Peter in 1875. Yeah, I'd say that's a hell of an influence.


A range of academic interests, personal perspectives, and life experiences adds much to the educational mix. Given your personal background, describe an experience that illustrates what you would bring to the diversity in a college community, or an encounter that demonstrated the importance of diversity to you.
You mean talk about how awesome I am? Ughh.


Topic of your choice.
Eff that. FINE! I wanna make an essay all about reverse transcriptase and how, like the cool lil virus, I will use my past experiences to infect and enrich my college community! Ohh man I wanna do that. Then I can use biology terms to make myself sound smarter than I actually am. YAY :D

I'm probably not gonna go with that idea, but I'll write a paragraph about it and take two good sentences from it :D

In other news....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FWsQQgbKkjc

I love Germans and their fun techno.

This Summer

Now before I start my common app work for the night, I feel like blogging again. And a topic I would like to address is this summer. The weird thing about this summer is "schedules". It's the kinda thing where I'll call up someone and be like "Hey! When do you wanna hang? Free today?" And the conversation goes something like "Oh no I have (work/practice/some other time commitment) does (blank) day work for you?" "Ahh no I have (another commitment) that day. What about...." and so on and so forth. Now we've been workin around schedules all junior year, ya know? This is nothin new. But the reason it SUCKS so much this summer, is that this is how life is gonna be now. It'll be even worse once all my friends and I go to college. And who knows about next summer! Unless everyone I know and love decides not to get a job (extremely unlikely), not take summer classes (even more unlikely, considering the tendencies of alot of people I know), and not leave on family vacations, next summer will be even more difficult to navigate though. Like, frick. I mean we've made the best of it. It has been a good summer, but the reality is last summer was mind blowingly awesome and this one was decent. Ehhhhhhhh I sound like a whiny teenager. I'm lucky to have a summer and time and all that. But I won't get another high school =/

Regardless of all this, today was a decent day. Woke up at 1, bought school stuff, went to work, went over to Rahul's and watched half of Toy Story 3 (:DDDDDDDDDDD)

Dear 11:11 wish that I missed,
Please add 6 more weeks to the summer, that'd be fine.
Amen <3

After Work Ramen

is what I'm eating right now! I hate now being able to eat at work. It's like...being in school, and everyone is allowed to have gum and has packs upon packs of it, but you can't have any. So 6 hours of being around those edible dishes has caused me to create this sauce (which now kinda looks scarey) to put on my ramen. The good thing about living in a half-Italian-American house is that we always have pasta sauce, cheese, and olive oil on hand. I think I used too much olive oil. Ehhhh awkward. But its good!! And the sauce:ramen ratio is off. Yeah this definitely needs...whats it called...the thing you put things through to get all the water out? Sift? But its not a sift. Oh man my mind is gone tonight.

Work was good today, made a new friend whilst working, got some tips, and changed my schedule so I have 2 key days for next week off. I like it when things work out.

So now I'm home, eating ramen, talking to my cousin about her latest boy adventures, and listening to old school Jay Sean (who, btw, looks INSANELY awkward dancing with this chick in the video). I don't mind this chill time very much, but I'm annoyed by the fact that usually I would've been coming home in 5 minutes/and/or stalling for another half hour. Tis a weird thing about this summer. A weird thing indeed....

It's been awhile...

Since a certain boyfriend of mine (of the Rahul-persuasion) decided to be a creeper and read my ancient blogs, I've been reminded of how fun they were to write =) so I'm back online! at least for this post. A lot has happened since November of 2009. I finished junior year of high school (holy crap) finished my two APs (4 in bio and 5 in lang, woooo), started summer, got a job, went to the UP, went on a canoe trip, came home, and now I'm here!
It's been a crazy week; I was in Rifle River on an amaaaaaazing canoe trip with some awesome people. We canoed, tubed, flipped each other over, camped, played confusing camp fire games, chilled, had mass outside, had a Jesus Rave, and watched shooting starts together. I got back on Thursday, worked today, and missed hangout with Patti in AA (=''''''() but I did get to chill with the previously mentioned boyfriend before he went on his mini-vacation/college tour/grad party thing. And he got me a chocolate cupcake!! which was my dinner tonight btw (probably one of the best dietary decisions I've made all week). I am also now the proud mother of a baby cloud named Moon Bounce. I'm very worried about how he will adjust to his new life in here. Parenting brings alot of worries, even for cloud parents (hehe).
This weekend shall bring a Saturday of working and calling people to adjust my all-of-a-sudden-jam-packed-schedule, and then a Sunday of finding out who is still in town that I can hang with/possible AP Euro work. Aren't I a normal teenager!! Uh I guess that's all for now.

Here's a picture of Cloudy before he floated on home! He has his father's eyes...isn't that adorable!